31上 少年郎怦然心动 病老头玩笑生死（2 / 2）

近来总是恐惧，他不敢随意地说什么或者做什么，他努力地忽视“那个人”，假装自己是个正常人在街上漫步、在家里忙碌。<script>document.writeln(qsbs.bb('PHA+5LqL5a6e5LiK77yM5L2V6Ie06L+c5oaO5oGo6Ieq5bex5Li65LqG5omu5ryU5omA6LCT55qE5q2j5bi45Lq644CB5q2j5bi45LiI5aSr44CB5q2j5bi45a626ZW/6ICM5Y6L5oqR5Yiw5aSx5Y675rCn5rCU77yM5Y+v5oOc5q+P5qyh5oqX5LqJ55qE57uT5p6c5peg5LiN5aaC5q2k44CC5LqO5piv77yM5LuW57un57ut5YGH6KOF5q2j5bi46ICM56ev5p6B5Zyw5bGl6KGM5LuW55qE5LiA5YiH56S+5Lya6LSj5Lu744CB5ryU57uO5LuW55qE5LiA5YiH56S+5Lya6KeS6Imy44CCPC9wPg=='));</script>

事实上，何致远憎恨自己为了扮演所谓的正常人、正常丈夫、正常家长而压抑到失去氧气，可惜每次抗争的结果无不如此。于是，他继续假装正常而积极地履行他的一切社会责任、演绎他的一切社会角色。<script>document.writeln(qsbs.bb('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'));</script>

随着两个孩子的长大，随着自己离开社会及脱离社会交往的时间越久，他越感受到自己的无意义和不被容忍。他在幼儿园其他小朋友的家长眼中、在菜市场大妈的口中感受到了这种无意义和不被容忍。他只愿抛开世俗去寻一处安静的场所，可以每天不被打搅地创作，可以不被外力压迫、不计世俗结果地自由创作。<script>document.writeln(qsbs.bb('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'));</script>

何致远很清醒、很明白，这一年来因为严重的失眠和焦虑，他意识到自己的心理状态变得有些奇怪——封闭而抑郁、总是闷闷不乐、不太愿意说话。不知道有多少次了，他想要决绝地与这个世界隔离开，想要禁止自己的肢体触碰大地上的任何东西，哪怕是脚底也要用一双鞋底来隔离。他不愿再与这个功利、媚俗、浅薄的世界有任何接触了。<script>document.writeln(qsbs.bb('PHA+5LuW6K6o5Y6M6L+Z6YeM77yM5bCx5YOP6L+Z6YeM6K6o5Y6M5LuW5LiA5qC344CCPC9wPg=='));</script>

他讨厌这里，就像这里讨厌他一样。<script>document.writeln(qsbs.bb('PHA+5ry+5ry+6YaS5p2l5LqG77yM5aW55Y+I6Lip552A6LiP5p2/6L2m5Zyo5bGL6YeM5ZG85ZW46amw6aqL44CC5q+P5LiA5Liq6KeS6JC96YO95Zue6I2h552A5a2p5a2Q5riF6ISG5Yiw6IGS5Zmq55qE5Zue6Z+z77yM5L2V6Ie06L+c5bqU6K+l6auY5YW077yM5LiN5bqU6K+l55qx55yJ77yb5LuW5bqU6K+l5a695a655oiW5b+96KeG77yM5LiN5bqU6K+l5YWz6LW36Zeo5p2l6ZqU56a75ry+5ry+55qE5ZG85ZW45ZKM5ZG85ZW455qE5ry+5ry+44CCPC9wPg=='));</script>

漾漾醒来了，她又踩着踏板车在屋里呼啸驰骋。每一个角落都回荡着孩子清脆到聒噪的回音，何致远应该高兴，不应该皱眉；他应该宽容或忽视，不应该关起门来隔离漾漾的呼啸和呼啸的漾漾。<script>document.writeln(qsbs.bb('PHA+5ry+5ry+55y86KeB552A54i454i45oKE5oKE5YWz5LqG5oi/6Zeo77yM5aW56am76Laz5bCR6K6477yM5LiN5YaN5ZG85ZaK5LqG44CCPC9wPg=='));</script>

漾漾眼见着爸爸悄悄关了房门，她驻足少许，不再呼喊了。<script>document.writeln(qsbs.bb('PHA+5LiL5Y2I5LiJ54K577yM5aSn5aSn55qE5bGL5a2Q6YeM5Ly85LmO5Y+q5Ymp5LiL5LqG5Zub5bKB55qE5L2V5LiA5ry+5LiA5Liq5Lq644CC5aW55oSf5Yiw5a2k54us77yM5a2k54us55qE5pe25YCZ5Lu75L2V546p5YW36YO95LiN566X5piv546p5YW35LqG77yM5YyF5ous5aW55omL6YeM5pyA54ix55qE6LiP5p2/6L2m44CC5bCP5aeR5aiY5peg5Y+v5aWI5L2V5Zyw5o6o552A6L2m5Y675LqG54i354i355qE5oi/6Ze044CC5q2k5pe25q2k5Yi777yM5Zyo6L+Z6Ze05aSn5aSn55qE56m65pe355qE5bGL5a2Q6YeM77yM54i354i35piv5L2V5LiA5ry+6LW26LWw5a2k54us55qE5pyA5ZCO5LiA5qC55rGC5pWR56i76I2J5LqG44CCPC9wPg=='));</script>

下午三点，大大的屋子里似乎只剩下了四岁的何一漾一个人。她感到孤独，孤独的时候任何玩具都不算是玩具了，包括她手里最爱的踏板车。小姑娘无可奈何地推着车去了爷爷的房间。此时此刻，在这间大大的空旷的屋子里，爷爷是何一漾赶走孤独的最后一根求救稻草了。<script>document.writeln(qsbs.bb('PHA+5aW55oOz5ZKM6ICB5aS06IGK5aSp77yM5Y+v5piv5LuO5LiK5Y2I5Yiw546w5Zyo77yM6YKj5Liq54ix5ZKM5aW56IGK5aSp55qE5Lq65LiA55u05Zyo552h6KeJ44CCPC9wPg=='));</script>

她想和老头聊天，可是从上午到现在，那个爱和她聊天的人一直在睡觉。<script>document.writeln(qsbs.bb('PHA+4oCc5L2g5Li65LuA5LmI6L+Y5Zyo552h6KeJ5ZGA77yf5L2g5Li65LuA5LmI6L+Y5Zyo552h6KeJ5ZGA77yf546w5Zyo5piv5LiL5Y2I5Za94oCm4oCm5oiR5aaI5aaI5pma5LiK5b+r5LiL54+t5LqG4oCm4oCm5oiR5ZOl5ZOl5pma5LiK5b+r5pS+5a2m5LqG4oCm4oCm5L2g6KaB5LiN6KaB5Zad5rC05ZGA77yM5oiR5Y+v5Lul57uZ5L2g5YCS5rC04oCm4oCm5L2g5piv5Liq5aSn5oeS6Jmr44CB6ICB5oeS6Jmr44CB5Y+I5aSn5Y+I6ICB55qE5bCP5oeS6Jmr4oCm4oCm5L2g5oCO5LmI6L+Y5LiN6YaS5ZGA4oCm4oCm4oCd5ry+5ry+55uv552A6ICB6ams5ZG85ZC455qE6by75a2U77yM5Y+v5oCc5Zyw6Ieq6KiA6Ieq6K+t44CCPC9wPg=='));</script>

“你为什么还在睡觉呀？你为什么还在睡觉呀？现在是下午喽……我妈妈晚上快下班了……我哥哥晚上快放学了……你要不要喝水呀，我可以给你倒水……你是个大懒虫、老懒虫、又大又老的小懒虫……你怎么还不醒呀……”漾漾盯着老马呼吸的鼻孔，可怜地自言自语。<script>document.writeln(qsbs.bb('PHA+5bCP5a2p5a2Q5b+N5LiN5L2P77yM5bCG6ICB6ams55qE6by75a2U5o2P5L2P5LqG77yM5aW55b+N552A5omO5omO55qE6IOh6aG777yM5oOz556n556n54i354i35pyJ5LuA5LmI5Y+N5bqU44CC5Y+q6KeB6YKj6ICB5aS05omT5ZG85Zmc55qE5aOw6Z+z5Y+Y5aSn5LqG77yM5LuW5byg5Zi05ZaY5rCU77yM5LuW552B55y85LqG77yB5ry+5ry+57yp5Zue5omL77yM56yR5Zi75Zi75Zyw55uv552A6ICB6ams4oCU4oCU57uI5LqO5pyJ5Lq65ZKM5aW56K+06K+d5LqG44CCPC9wPg=='));</script>

小孩子忍不住，将老马的鼻孔捏住了，她忍着扎扎的胡须，想瞧瞧爷爷有什么反应。只见那老头打呼噜的声音变大了，他张嘴喘气，他睁眼了！漾漾缩回手，笑嘻嘻地盯着老马——终于有人和她说话了。<script>document.writeln(qsbs.bb('PHA+4oCc5L2g5Li65LuA5LmI6L+Y5Zyo552h6KeJ5ZGA77yf4oCd5ry+5ry+6Zeu6ICB6ams44CCPC9wPg=='));</script>

“你为什么还在睡觉呀？”漾漾问老马。<script>document.writeln(qsbs.bb('PHA+4oCc5ZGD4oCm4oCm54i354i355eF5LqG77yM5LiN5piv5Zyo552h6KeJ44CC4oCd6ICB6ams5rWR6Lqr5peg5Yqb77yM5Y2K552B552A55y8552b5bCP5aOw6K+044CCPC9wPg=='));</script>

“呃……爷爷病了，不是在睡觉。”老马浑身无力，半睁着眼睛小声说。<script>document.writeln(qsbs.bb('PHA+4oCc54i354i35L2g6KaB5LiN6KaB5Zad5rC077yM5oiR5Y6757uZ5L2g5YCS5rC05Zad5aW95LiN5aW977yf4oCd5ry+5ry+6La05Zyo6ICB6ams5aS06L656Zeu44CCPC9wPg=='));</script>

“爷爷你要不要喝水，我去给你倒水喝好不好？”漾漾趴在老马头边问。<script>document.writeln(qsbs.bb('PHA+4oCc5aW977yB4oCd6ICB6ams6aG6552A5ZG85Ye655qE5rCU5Y+R5Ye66L+Z5Liq5a2X44CC5LuW5rex5ZC45Yeg5Y+j5rCU77yM5oOz5Yqo5Yqo5LiN5LqG77yM5oOz6YaS6YaS5LiN5LqG44CCPC9wPg=='));</script>

“好！”老马顺着呼出的气发出这个字。他深吸几口气，想动动不了，想醒醒不了。<script>document.writeln(qsbs.bb('PHA+5ry+5ry+5bCG6LiP5p2/6L2m6Z2g5Zyo5bqK5aS077yM6ICM5ZCO5LiA5b+D5LiA5oSP5Zyw5Y675YCS5rC044CC5Lik5YiG6ZKf5ZCO5aW555uu5LiN6L2s552b5Zyw55uv552A5omL5Lit5p2v6YeM55qE5LiA5Y+j5rC06L+b5p2l5LqG44CCPC9wPg=='));</script>

漾漾将踏板车靠在床头，而后一心一意地去倒水。两分钟后她目不转睛地盯着手中杯里的一口水进来了。<script>document.writeln(qsbs.bb('PHA+4oCc5L2g55qE5rC05p2l5Za977yB4oCd5ry+5ry+5oqK5rC05pS+5Zyo6ICB6ams5p6V5aS06L6555qE5YeJ5bit5LiK44CC6ICB6ams5LiA55yL77yM6YKj5rC05bCR5b6X5Y+q5pyJ5Liq5p2v5bqV77yM5LuW5rKh5Yqy6LW36Lqr77yM5Y+q5oOz57yT57yT5YaN5Zad44CCPC9wPg=='));</script>

“你的水来喽！”漾漾把水放在老马枕头边的凉席上。老马一看，那水少得只有个杯底，他没劲起身，只想缓缓再喝。<script>document.writeln(qsbs.bb('PHA+4oCc562J5Lya4oCU4oCU562J5Lya54i354i35YaN5Zad77yB4oCd6ICB6ams6Zet552A55y8552b6K+044CCPC9wPg=='));</script>

“等会——等会爷爷再喝！”老马闭着眼睛说。<script>document.writeln(qsbs.bb('PHA+6KeB54i354i35LiN6K+06K+d5LqG77yM5ry+5ry+5Zyo6ICB6ams6ICz6L6554m55oSP6K+i6Zeu4oCc5L2g6KaB5LiN6KaB6Lef5oiR6IGK5aSp77yf5oiR5Y+v5Lul57uZ5L2g6K6y552h5YmN5pWF5LqL77yB4oCdPC9wPg=='));</script>

见爷爷不说话了，漾漾在老马耳边特意询问“你要不要跟我聊天？我可以给你讲睡前故事！”<script>document.writeln(qsbs.bb('PHA+6ICB6ams5oqs5LqG5oqs55y855qu77yM55yL56m/5LqG5bCP5a2p5Y+M55y46YeM55qE5pyf55u877yM6K+04oCc6KaB77yB4oCdPC9wPg=='));</script>

老马抬了抬眼皮，看穿了小孩双眸里的期盼，说“要！”<script>document.writeln(qsbs.bb('PHA+4oCc6YKj5oiR57uZ5L2g6K6y5Liq5bCP6bif55qE5pWF5LqL5ZCn44CC4oCdPC9wPg=='));</script>

“那我给你讲个小鸟的故事吧。”<script>document.writeln(qsbs.bb('PHA+4oCc5aW977yB4oCdPC9wPg=='));</script>

“好！”

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